No Longer Alone
by RiverSong DreamShadow
Summary: Harry blames himself for Sirius's death, and remains apathetic all summer. He barely eats or sleeps, and never speaks. At least not until a gleaming white Horse Chooses him! Valdemar Crossover. Check out the Re-Write, I Once Was Lost!
1. An Introduction

Chapter One

Three gleaming white horses stood grazing in a wide, peaceful field. The observer was startled to learn that these were no mere horses, but very intelligent beings called Companions… and that all three were worried over a certain human.

_:Atayla__, if you can feel him, why don't you go to him? It's a simple matter of feeling the pull and following it to your __Chosen.:_

The larger two were seemingly instructing the smaller in how to find her…Chosen? What Chosen? And how were they talking? The answer came to him as quickly as the knowledge of Companions… MindSpeech!

_:It's__ not like that, Kantor! I've traveled all through __Valdemar__Karse__- disguised, of course- __Menmellith__, even __Rethwellan__! I just can't find him! It's tearing me apart! I feel his grief, anguish, and oh! __the__ guilt! And I can't do anything_

_:If__ you can't find him, then maybe he doesn't want to be found…: _The largest Companion had finally spoken, but his voice was…different… it was familiar to the observer… It seemed young and old, like the wind sweeping through the mountains; it was almost otherworldly…

_:No__! I won't believe that! I can't_The small one- Atayla- exclaimed.

_:What's__ this about can't believe? Of course you can! It's happened before, where the Chosen is content where he or she is. It is never comfortable for the Companion, but it happens…:_ The one called Kantor spoke. _:I__ had to hide in the __Karsite__ Army until I was 'given' to my Chosen, and even then I had to hide my nature until his own land betrayed him. When I 'kidnapped' him, he was furious! I offered to break our bond, and it took him a while to accept what had happened… And now our bond is strong, stronger than most…:_

_:At__ least he accepted you! This is tearing me apart! I'll die if this continues… and not only that, he's mage-gifted! Holding off his powers are taxing at any time, but when he isn't even helping… This is killing me!:_ Atayla's voice was layered with anguish, and the others shared a glance that spoke volumes of their concern.

_:Rolan__, correct me if I'm wrong, but…:_ Kantor spoke again, a question in his voice.

_:You__ want to know if young __Atayla__ can Gate to her Chosen.:_ Kantor nodded… as well as a 'horse' could.

Rolan thought for a moment, then replied, _:Yes__, it is possible. It may well be the best thing for them both. If __Atayla__ goes, and her Chosen denies her, then __Atayla__ will be free to die in peace. Yes, that is __best.:_ The majestic Companion relayed this information to the youngster.

_:You__ mean I can go? I can Gate? Thank you __Rolan__! I'll not be gone long_ Without another word, Atayla dashed off towards the center of the field, where a Grove hid the remains of a long- dead temple.

The observer left as well, returning to his bed in a very distant house at Number Four, Privet Drive.

Neither was near enough to hear the last thought of the conversation; _:She__ is not the only one with such symptoms; there are at least two others who suffer as she does.:_ Rolan shook his head.

_:I__ am aware of that; I hopes he will find the cause on her journey. Then perhaps the solution will make itself __apparent.:_

o0O0o

Atayla arrived at the only part of the temple still standing… the massive doorway. The wood had long ago rotted, leaving the stones to stand alone. Atayla pictured the person she was targeting… a young male, short and thin, with messy black hair and bright emerald eyes. She wove his own magic into the doorway… the tendrils were remarkably well behaved as they sensed her determination. Atayla quickly completed the ritual and stepped back, gathering her breath. She stepped forward, through the Gate, nothing in her mind but pure determination to find her Chosen.

o0O0o

Harry Potter lay on his bed at Number Four Privet Drive, staring apathetically at the wall. He had not moved more than a once a day since he had returned to this prison.

**And either must die at the hand of the other… **

The Prophecy weighed heavy on his mind and heart. It was a mantra that ran through his head day and night, filling his dreams.

**For neither can live while the other survives…**

_:I'm__ sorry, Sirius… I never meant to lose you… I was trying to save you! And now __its__ all my fault you're gone. I hope you're happy now, with Mom and Dad. You deserve to be happy. I'm so sorry…:_

Harry heard his door open and two… no… three people enter the room. He didn't move from his position, only offered them his back as he continued to stare at the wall.

"Harry? Harry, we're here to pick you up… It's your birthday, remember?" That would be Hermione, making the other people Ron and… Remus maybe? He didn't know, and didn't really care. To care was to feel pain, and the pain hurt. O, how it hurt…

"Harry, come on, get up." They grabbed one of his arms and pulled him up. "We're going to HQ until school starts…" That got a reaction out of him. He tried to jerk his arm away, but whoever was holding it had a very strong grip… Remus, then.

"You're not getting out of this that easily, Harry. Yes Sirius is gone…" A pause. "He's gone, but he wouldn't want to be remembered like this. Come on Harry, let's go."

Harry finally turned to look at them, unaware that his generally bright eyes were dull, almost dead. He vaguely noticed that Remus' face was gaunt, his eyes red from insomnia. He noticed that Hermione had tears slowly rolling down her cheeks as she took in his appearance. Ron gave him a _look_ and said, "Mate, you look like Hell."

Harry made no response as he continued to examine them. He turned to face the wall again, ignoring their painful reminder of _Him_.

"Harry, I had hoped this wouldn't be necessary…" Remus again. Did that man never stop? He wouldn't go to _his_ old house, old prison. Why didn't they understand that?

Remus pushed a piece of paper into Harry's hands… a picture of his father and Sirius from their Hogwarts days. They looked so _happy!_ He had ruined this… His family would never have been targeted if it weren't for that prophecy…

He was aware of Ron and Hermione grabbing the picture, but before he realized what it was, Remus activated the portkey by saying "Phoenix Flight."

As Harry appeared in the kitchen of 12 Grimmauld Place, he spoke the only words yet this summer: "Damn you!"

o0O0o

In the end, they had been forced to stun him so he wouldn't hurt himself… They force-fed him a calming potion and had Remus carry him up to the room he had shared with Ron the summer before… The rest of the summer Harry spent in the same manner as the previous half… not eating, barely sleeping, staring at the wall apathetically.

Ginny came every day to talk to him, sometimes read to him. He learned that she and Dean had broken up, that she was learning how to cook, that Hermione was going spare waiting for the OWLs. This mattered little to him, but her presence was… comforting… in a way. She didn't try to change him, or make him adjust his behavior. She accepted him as he was, sharing his grief and grieving in her own way. She spoke of normal things; thing that took his mind off of the Death he had caused.

But he still stared at the wall, listening to the prophecy repeat over and over in his mind.

Except once…

The second night he had been at Grimmauld Place, he got up after everyone else was asleep… he even heard Ron's snores from across the hall. He went to the window and looked into the clear summer sky… He saw the Big and Little Dippers, Canis Major and…there… Sirius, the Dog Star.

He brought out a piece of parchment and a quill and began to map the starry sky. Towards dawn, he finally finished. It was accurate in every detail except one… the brightest star of the Canis Major constellation was missing… Sirius was gone.

He placed the paper on the desk and from then on ignored it, resuming his previous behavior.

Ginny noticed it the next day when she came up to visit him, but declined to mention it. She did not pity the youth before her, for she knew he despised that. Instead, she commiserated with him, and opened herself up to him; she was completely transparent with him. After a half-summer of listening to her stories, Harry felt he knew her better even than he knew Ron and Hermione.

o0O0o

There was no change in his behavior until September 1st… Remus went to find him, expecting to find the apathetic Harry lying on his bed, staring at the wall. Instead he found Harry dressed and packed, nearly ready to go.

For the second time that summer, Harry spoke. "When can I leave this Hellhole?"

Remus was startled by the change in his friend's son. "We'll be leaving in about half an hour for the station. Why don't you come down and eat something, Molly's gone spare with worry over you." He tentatively suggested. Harry looked at him and simply nodded once.

As Remus led Harry into the kitchen, the small crowd present hushed. They remained silent as Harry sat down and grabbed only a piece of toast and began to eat. The silence continued until Harry sent a pointed glare at those nearest him.

Breakfast went by quickly, without Harry saying a word to anyone. As the returning students- Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny- gathered their trunks in the entrance hall, The Order members present- Remus, Molly, Arthur, Kingsley, Tonks and Moody- congregated to say goodbye. All warned the students to behave and stay out of trouble.

Kingsley, Tonks, and Moody were to accompany the students to the station, and led them out into the street. Harry hung back for a moment, hesitating for only a second… He dashed to Remus and spoke once more as he embraced the last link to his parents: "I'm sorry I got him killed…" Harry tore out the door to catch up to the other students.

Remus stood frozen for a moment, but that was a moment too long. He wanted to run after Harry and sweep him into his arms and comfort him, but a group of muggles was walking in front the hidden house. By then it was too late, and the magical group was long gone.

o0O0o

The group arrived at the station and the students quickly boarded the train. The ride was uneventful… Malfoy didn't even make his yearly visit. Instead, Pansy Parkinson appeared, flanked by Crabbe and Goyle. She and Ron traded insults, but she left when she couldn't get any reaction out of Harry.

Harry remained apathetic to all surrounding him… except Ginny. He didn't really respond to her, but he listened.

The group trudged up to the carriages, trying to beat the coming rain. They succeeded… barely. The rain began to fall moments after the four found an empty carriage. It was soon accompanied by thunder and lightning, and the carriage shook with the force of the wind.

They made it into the Great Hall with no trouble. Harry received strange looks that showed sympathy, curiosity, and scorn.

After being led to the Gryffindor table, Harry meekly took his seat. By all outward appearances, the Golden Boy was completely pliant. But it was not so. Harry glanced around the Hall from beneath long eyelashes as the Sorting began. He even clapped quietly as a new Gryffindor was welcomed to his house.

Soon the Sorting was finished with yet another warning from the Hat to band together. Dumbledore initiated the feast with a clap of his hands, and sumptuous foods appeared on the table before him.

The food was magnificent: Venison, Ham, Roast Chicken… all were steaming hot and smelling delicious. The students tucked in with fork and knife… Harry glanced at his own knife, before grasping it and quickly hiding it under the table. He fingered the edge lightly, gasping softly as blood began to well up out of the small cut. He smiled lightly as he wrapped it in his napkin and hid it in his belt, waiting for the opportunity to present itself.

All through the rest of the feast, Harry had a nagging suspicion that something important was going to happen, but dismissed it as unimportant. After all, he had felt many such pulls through the summer. He suddenly doubled over in pain as the doors leading into the Great Hall were masked by a blinding light.

The light was not any single color… it was a rainbow with all colors, and yet it was the absence of everything. A picture soon appeared through the light… a grove of trees, some old ruins, and… a pure white horse? Yes, the horse began to trot towards them… through the picture!

Harry trembled as he recognized the horse- _Companion.:_ He told himself- from his dream. Atayla, she was called. She walked to the Gryffindor table and Harry looked down.

_:Keep__ her away from me…:_ He prayed to whatever God was listening. _:I__ deserve to be left alone, to die alone.:_

_:That__ is where you are mistaken, my Chosen.:_ The voice filled his mind. He ignored it, and refused to lift his head. _:Choose__ someone else. I don't deserve __you.:_ He heard the melodious plodding of silver hooves as they carried the Companion directly to... him. He looked up into Sapphire eyes as deep as the sky, and fell into them. He was drowning, and made no effort to save himself. As he fell even deeper, he heard from somewhere very far away, _:Hello__ Harry. I am __Atayla__, and I __Choose__ you, Harry. I Choose yo__u, and I will never leave __you.:_

_:Leave__ me be. You don't know what I've done. I kill everything I care for, and…:_ A velvety nose nuzzled his cheek. _:I__ love you Harry, and I will never forsake you. You are mine, my Chosen, and nothing could make me __leave.:_Harry finally reached his destination… A place deep within him where he knew he would never be lonely ever again.

Atayla kneeled before Harry, signaling him to get on, but Harry refused. Instead, he put his hand on Atayla's shoulder as they walked to the Head Table.

They walked through the center of the Hall, between Ravenclaw and Slytherin tables straight to Headmaster Dumbledore and bowed before Atayla's attention was caught by… Snape?

_:You:_ The word echoed through Harry's mind. He flinched, noting that he was one of the few to do so. Snape came around the table to bow before the majestic Companion.

"Yes, me." He said aloud. Whispers ran abundant through the room, questioning the sanity of a man who appeared to be talking to a horse. Harry watched the exchange with deep interest.

"What's this about?" He quietly asked his Companion. _:You'll__ see momentarily.:_ Atayla replied, more than a hint of mischief

_:You__ were thought dead long ago. Why are you here? Where is your Companion? You are Mira's Chosen, no?:_

Snape paled as the Companion spoke, and visibly flinched at the name... Mira. Again he answered aloud, "I was unaware that my comrades thought me dead. I was brought here only through an accident. Mira..." The man choked, tears glittering in his eyes as he drew a deep breath. "Mira was... killed soon after my arrival here. She was taken from me and... put down for the spirit in her. I was thwarted in my attempt to follow her by a wise man. I have since taught at this school."

The Companion's gaze softened as the man broke down before her. _:The__ solution is simple.:_ She said, again filling the minds of those sensitive. The broken man looked up at the glorious Companion, his face filled with desperation. _:You__ will return with myself and my Chosen, to take your rightful place as a true Herald of __Valdemar__. You will tell me which children are Gifted, and we will bring them with __us.:_

_:That__ is not necessary, __Atayla__. Our Chosen are also here. Thank you for opening the Gate for __us.:_ Three companions had just stepped out of the Gate while everyone's attention had been focused on the pair at the front of the Hall.

_:Rexera, __Terio, __Polath__. You are very welcome. In truth, I had hoped... Never mind. You know your Chosen?:_ Atayla's mindvoice was wrought with relief... She had honestly felt in over her head when she had recognized Severus. The Herald had long been thought dead, and to find him was both a joy and a burden. But now, she was not alone in the decision-making...

_:No__, we simply felt the pull, and now we are here.: _Terio spoke for the new-come Companions. _:We__ will deal with Herald Severus as you brief your Chosen on what exactly has happened. Hopefully our Chosen shall be revealed __soon.:_

_:Yes__, Peace be with you, and Good Night. Come Chosen, we will sleep, and tomorrow... What will come will come, and we will meet it __together.:_

Together. Such a wonderful word.

End Chapter


	2. A Choice

Chapter Two

That night in Gryffindor Tower, Harry fingered the knife he had stashed in his belt at Dinner. It had escaped notice, and Harry had nearly forgotten it in the excitement of being Chosen. He hoped Atayla would forgive him for what he had in mind… He didn't want to leave her, but… _:I__ deserve to die for the sins I committed, for the man I killed.:_

He dressed and re-hid the knife in his belt before going down to the Common Room. He slipped on his invisibility cloak and exited through the portrait, leaving the Fat Lady calling out for the student to return to bed. He walked quietly down the stairs to the Great Hall, and exited through the massive doors onto the Grounds.

Sirius' memorial had been placed in the cave just outside Hogsmeade where he and Buckbeak had hidden in Harry's fourth year. It had seemed appropriate, but Harry was dreading the long walk. His muscles were still weak from inactivity, and already were beginning to tremble.

Abruptly, a white shape loomed in front of him… _:Where__ are you going so late? You should be in __bed.:_ Atayla's voice was layered with concern. Harry somehow knew that he wouldn't be able to lie mind-to-mind, so he said, _:I__ have to see him one last time. I have to… to say __goodbye.:_

She hesitated before reluctantly answering, _:All__ right, but right after, you have to rest.:_

Harry felt a force guiding him through what to say, almost like a strange form of Deja vu. _:YesAtayla. I will rest directly after.:_ Harry replied, leaving his statement purposely open.

He stumbled soon after, and Atayla stopped.

_:Mount__, and I will carry you.:_ She said. _:You__ should not tax yourself so soon.:_

He did so, and long before he expected, they arrived at the mouth of the cave. It was not large enough to permit her entrance, so he dismounted and walked in alone. He pulled out his wand and cast a Silencing spell, just in case…

He turned around and… there it was. The tomb was made of stone, shaped like a coffin, and a spell had been placed on it to give it the appearance of silver veins running through the stone.

Harry kneeled down before the tomb and whispered, "I'm sorry, Sirius. I'm sorry I got you killed. Maybe when this is finished, you'll be able to forgive me. I miss you so much… I'll see you soon."

He pulled out the knife as the first tears finished their journey down his cheeks and dropped onto his hands.

He gripped the knife in his right hand and slit his wrist, gasping loudly and dropping the knife. It was as sharp as he had hoped, and sharper than he expected. He quickly picked up the blade with his left hand and repeated the procedure, slicing his wrist almost to the bone.

He looked down on the quickly-pooling blood as he thought, _:Time__ for the next great adventure…:_

Atayla caught his thought, and reached through their already-unusually-strong bond to see through his eyes. She saw the crimson stain, the bloodied knife, and let out a mental scream that was heard by all sensitive beings- Companion and Human- within a league.

_:I'm__ sorry, __Atayla__, you'll find someone who deserves you more than I do…: _Harry sent through their bond before embracing the welcome blackness.

o0O0o

Ginny sat up in her bed as she heard the scream, before slipping into pants and shoving her feet into boots and leaping down the stairs and out the portrait. She met Draco and Snape in the Great Hall. They barely paused before running onto the grounds, unaware of the small crowd that had followed each of them. The three Companions met them just outside, quickly allowing them to mount and spiriting them away.

Atayla let loose another scream as she desperately tried to get to her beloved Chosen. Not only mental, this scream was heard by the crowd at Hogwarts and directed them towards the Cave where Atayla's Chosen's life was slowly slipping away. The professors all shared a _look_ before following the trail the Companions had taken.

Meanwhile, the three Companions were bearing their newly found Chosen to the site. They found Atayla trying to push her way into the cave, and failing. Her forelegs were bloody from trying to pound the entrance wider. As the Companions arrived, she seemed to come out of the destructive trance and collapse. The humans ran to her, and Severus diagnosed her as "…exhausted but otherwise fine."

Ginny and Draco had already entered the Cave, and he turned around to the sound of Draco's retching. He ran into the cave and immediately noted the pale form of an unconscious Harry Potter sprawled in a pool of his own blood on the ground before the memorial tomb of his ex-rival. He tore strips from his own nightshirt and bandaged the still-bleeding wounds of the newly-Chosen child.

_:Thank__ God he didn't know how to properly cut his wrists.:_ Severus thought as he worked. He did _not_ like how the boy was chilled, or how pale he was. _:He__ has to get professional Healing of a degree that can only be found at the __Collegium__. But how would I get him there? He isn't even properly stabilized..._

_:Do__ not fear, Chosen, I am already opening a Gate to take care of the youngling.: _A Companion spoke into his mind. Severus ignored most of the sentence except for the word 'Gate'. He was torn… the child needed medical attention quickly, but he had already proved himself sensitive to Gate-energy.

_:Very__ well, but hurry!:_ Severus Sent, hoping he had made the right decision.

The Gate was quickly established at the cave's mouth, and as the revived Atayla carried her Chosen through, Dumbledore and the other professors arrived on the scene.

"Severus, what is going on? Why is that horse taking Harry through that… that thing?" The shouted questions came fast and furious as the other Companions nudged Draco and Ginny through the Gate, until finally a Companion did likewise to him. The last thing Severus saw before the darkness claimed him was the form of the Hogwarts residents looking through the Gate-terminus before it closed.

o0O0o

Weaponsmaster Alberich was conversing with his Companion Kantor as they walked through the Companion's Field. The topic of their conversation was the apparent disappearance of four Companions.

_:I__ would assume they all felt the pull of their Chosen, but four at once? Kantor, I know you…:_ Alberich broke off as his foresight assaulted him with a vision of something in the very near future…

_Four Companions arrived through a Gate, with four human partners… One Companion was carrying a child- a boy- who looked to be gravely injured. The Gate-terminus was the Doorway in the Grove, not far from where they were now… No one heard their call in time, and the boy died painfully just before Healers arrived. The Companion soon followed…_

_:Kantor__! Run to the __Collegium__ and fetch a Healer! A strong one… and Hurry! Meet me at the Grove as quickly as possible_ Alberich sent his Companion as soon as the vision ended. He relayed the cursed thing as he ran to the Grove to offer any possible aide.

He arrived just as the Gate-terminus closed and was barely able to catch a man on the verge of collapse.

He laid him gently on the ground as he turned to the two frightened younglings- a tall blonde boy and a slim redheaded girl. Both were standing next to Companions, so he assumed they'd been Chosen.

"You were Chosen?" He asked. The boy looked at the Companions and then nodded, the girl following his example.

"Good. Ask your Companions if they are willing to carry you to the Collegium."

The Companions nodded without actually being asked, and nudged their Chosen. The boy mounted easily but the girl refused. "I'm not leaving Harry in an unknown place with a stranger who may or may not want to hurt him! He's my friend and I won't abandon him just because a stranger sends me…" The girl stopped, and looked at her Companion. Presumably, they spoke, but Alberich did not intrude. Momentarily, the girl nodded.

"My apologies. I will go." She mounted her Companion, and the four set off for the Collegium.

Alberich turned his attention to the boy now, taking in the bandaged wrists.

_:Suicide__ attempt, then?:_ He mindspoke Kantor. _:According__ to __Atayla__, yes. Apparently, he felt he had killed a very close friend when he received a vision of the friend being tortured and went haring off to 'rescue' him. It ended up being a trap, and the friend was killed in the process of actually rescuing the boy...Sad, really, but not completely unexpected. Rather like Herald __Vanyel__, come to think of it…I'm almost there, and I have Healer Evelyn and __Kerowyn__ with __me_

Momentarily, Kantor thundered to a halt, Healer Evelyn nearly coming off in the abrupt halt. She dismounted quickly and asked Alberich "Who is the patient? What is the source of the injuries?"

"The boy is the primary patient, with his Companion and this man as secondary concerns." Alberich answered with equal speed. "We believe he cut his wrists. He has been Chosen, so your best effort will be appreciated."

Kerowyn dismounted Sayvil and walked over to examine the man. He was slowly stirring, and for some reason, he looked familiar… He groaned softly and opened his eyes a slit. When the light- or lack thereof- did not seem to cause him pain, he opened them wider and began to take in his surroundings.

He noted the white and green uniforms of the Heralds and Healers, the four Companions present, and the injured boy. Kerowyn noted the compassion and concern in the man's eyes as he gazed on – she guessed – his charge.

"How is he, Captain? Will he recover?" the man asked. The voice confirmed her suspicion that she had indeed met the man before. She _never_ forgot a voice… It could have been deadly in her previous line of work. _And_ he knew her as Captain… but then again, so did many she had never met. Her reputation often preceded her…

"The Healer is stabilizing him as we speak. He will likely recover physically, but mentally, emotionally? It's anyone's guess…" She responded. The man nodded, and thanked her before turning to the Companion. She remembered a scout she had command over when she Captained the SkyBolts… what was his name?

Severus was concerned for the child, but there was little he could do. :_Terio?:_ He called. The answer came immediately.

_:Behind__ you.:_ Severus turned around and barely controlled his reaction. When Terio said behind him, he meant _right_ behind him… _Terio__, how would you suggest we tell everyone about me? It would almost be easier if we didn't say anything, but if it got out, then it would be far worse than if we told them now; but if we tell them now, I'll be labeled a deserter and traitor. What should we do?:_

_:Severus__, Chosen, they cannot do anything to you. You were trapped in a very different realm where the bond between you and your Companion was weakened almost to the breaking point, and then your Companion was murdered. You have been through Hell and back, and no one will blame you for deserting, simply because you did __not.:_

_:But__Terio__…: _Severus' thought was cut off by a physical voice softly calling his name.

"Severus? Is that you? Gods above youngling! You've grown up!" Kerowyn grimly smiled as he flinched. "Don't worry lad, I don't think anyone else quite realizes it's you yet. What happened to you? One day you just disappeared. If it weren't for the fact that you served with me as a merc, then again as a Herald, I would have said you deserted… Some still did call it desertion. It's good to see you well. How is your Companion, Mira, was it? I seem to recall…" She stopped when she saw the pain in his face.

"Severus, youngling, what happened? Come on, remember how we met? Remember how we would sit together in the library at BoltHaven and just talk after your lessoning? You trusted me then, you can trust me now." She sent a quick mindcall to Alberich. :_Alberich__, this will need privacy; if you don't mind, will you stop eavesdropping? I think he can sense it…: _Alberich grudgingly acknowledged her request, and Severus subconsciously relaxed. He remembered back to those times Kero had mentioned.

o0O0o

_He was eight__ years old. __His family had been killed or kidnapped by bandits last year, and he had been taking care of himself since then. However, winter was coming on, and game was getting scarce. He needed to find a job, something that would provide him with food and shelter._

_He'd heard in town that a __merc__ company would be passing through; maybe they could use an extra scout, or even cook's helper!__ Any job that would provide food would do._

_He knew that if he asked them while they were in tow, he would likely be turned down. They might even guilt-trip one of the families to take him in; he refused to let that happen! Food was scarce enough that he refused to take food from another child._

_The company was much larger than he expected, and they were led by a woman! It wasn't until they passed through the town plaza that he noticed their insignia: these were the __SkyBolts_

_Now he was nervous; everyone had heard about the __SkyBolts__, led by Captain __Kerowyn__! They were famous, almost as much as __Idra's__Sunhawks__! But still, he liked the idea of working for the best…_

_He followed the company for a few days, until on the evening of the fourth night away from the __village,__ he was caught by a sentry who had snuck up behind him._

_"Here's the lad who's been following us, Captain!" The scout announced as she pulled Severus into the command tent._

_"Well, youngling? Have you got anything to say for yourself? Or shall we send you home to Mama?" Captain __Kerowyn__ laughed, and the others in the tent followed her example._

_Severus cleared his throat, drawing all attention to his person and effectively silencing the tent. "Captain, I need a job. I'll accept pay in the form of food and shelter, and in return I'll scout and do chores and stuff. Do we have a bargain?" __He said stiffly, extremely formal for his small size._

_The Captain just laughed again. She continued to do so until she saw he was being entirely serious. "Lad, you're still a child. Surely your parents are missing you by now."_

_"Beg pardon, Captain, but no. They're dead." He said bluntly. "I survived last winter on my own, but game's getting scarce, and like I said, I need a job."_

_Kerowyn__ sighed, and to the surprise of all around her (including herself), she acquiesced._

_"Very well.__ We're headed to our Winter Quarters and __BoltHaven__, and we'll give you a trial.__ Tanner, find someone willing to give the lad some bed-room, and issue him a bedroll. You have a horse?" She asked Severus__. When he shook his head, she frowned __thoughtfully. "We have a few replacements… we'll take you out tomorrow and try you out."_

_Tanner led Severus out at the Captain's dismissal, found him a tent, bedroll and __tentmate__, and left him to his own devices. Severus stayed through the winter, learning everything they __SkyBolts__ would teach him. He soaked it all up like a sponge, and when summer came, he signed a contract with the company.__Kero__ continued to teach him personally, and more often than not their lessons took place in the library; not all __SkyBolts__ were literate, and so few ventured into the quiet chamber. The hours spent there were some of the most peaceful Severus could ever remember, second only to the times he could remember in his mother's lap as a babe._

_He__ went on tours of duty with the company, performed his chores, and occasionally scouted when an adult would be too conspicuous. After all, no one noticed a __young refugee around the mercenary camps…_

_Two years later, Talia was sent as an emissary from Queen __Selenay__ to bargain for the __SkyBolt's__ services. Talia took him in as a younger brother, treating him as the adult he acted like instead of the child he appeared to be. Severus appreciated it greatly… most adults took one look at him and underestimated him._

_That was the campaign where Mira had chosen him, where __Kero__ had been chosen, and where he had entered __Valdemar's__ service as a Herald-trainee. He had been out riding with Mira when they had been caught in the stray Gate… torn away from a place he had called home, and from people he considered family._

_He had been almost eleven years old._

o0O0o

"Mira was killed." Severus answered slowly, returning to himself. "We were forced through a Gate into a different realm, and we landed in a very different place. Our bond was weakened, and soon people came to take Mira away from me. She fought, and was… was killed for her Spirit." Tears rolled down his cheeks, leaving tracks through the dirt. "A man found me, and he saved my life. He took me in and taught me, and let me teach at his school. That's where I've been ever since." His shoulders shook with suppressed sobs as Kerowyn wrapped her arms around him and comforted him.

"Youngling, it's alright now, everything is fine. You survived, which is what Mira wanted. You're safely home now, and you're still a Herald. If I'm not mistaken, Terio has Chosen you. Why don't you ask him, hm? Go ahead…"

As if he were a small child again, he turned to the beautiful Companion beside him and mind spoke:_Terio__? Have you Chosen me? I know I don't deserve it but…:_

_:Severus__, Chosen, you deserve it more than almost anyone else. I __Choose__ you, Severus. I cannot replace your loss, but I can help… __If you let me.__ Think on it, Severus, and…:_

Severus cut him off. _:I__ have no need to think any more than I already have. I am honored that you would Choose me, and I thank you.:_ As he stared into the bright blue eyes, all Severus could think was that the place that had once been filled by Mira, then emptied, was now being filled again; he would never have to go back to being the 'bloody git' as so many of his pupils had said he was.

A soft moan interrupted the moment and both Companion and Human turned to the boy just waking after the Healer's ministrations.

End Chapter


	3. Meeting Old Friends

Chapter Three

What happened last time:

_A soft moan interrupted the moment and both Companion and Human turned to the boy just stirring after the Healer's ministrations._

_o0O0o_

Harry had watched as he slit his wrists, and then passed into darkness for a while. Then, after the Darkness had passed he came to a beautiful place, all green, grassy meadows and forested hills. He was too awed by the amazing peace of the place to notice four very familiar figures approaching him. They made a silent advance, and he was oblivious until he felt the sensation of a hand on his back.

"Harry?" He started and turned to answer the very familiar voice. He saw the four people he had hoped he would, and smiled. "So it worked then? I'm really dead?"

Sirius, James, Lily, and Cedric all frowned, and Sirius replied, "No, Harry. You aren't quite dead. Not yet at least."

Harry grimaced, then groaned. "I'm not dead? Ginny is going to kill me! As soon as I go back, it'll be… Wait, if I'm not dead, how can I talk to you?"

Lily smiled sadly at her son as she replied, "Harry, youngling, you are in the Havens. We were allowed to visit you and talk for a very short amount of time. Harry, you have to go back."

Cedric nodded emphatically. "Yeah. You know, I never did get to thank you for taking care of my body. And for taking care of Cho last year. It means a lot to me. So, thanks."

"So you don't blame me? But it's my fault you died. I told you to take the Cup with me to tie, and I as good as killed Sirius. Mom and Dad would never have died if it weren't for me. If I hadn't been born…"

James, who had previously remained silent, spoke now. "If you hadn't been born, Voldemort would have covered the world in darkness. He would have reigned until another Prophecy was made and a child born to defeat him. We saw the results in a ForeSight dream when you were born. We chose to sacrifice the few- us- to save the many. It was our choice. I'll let Sirius and Cedric speak for themselves', but how in Havens' name did you come up with the ludicrous idea that your mother and I blamed you? Nothing could be farther from the truth!"

Cedric and Sirius nodded, and Sirius said, "Harry I can understand your guilt, and perhaps even thinking we blame you but I have one question."

Harry looked at him, eyes wide with interest. "Ask away, Sirius."

Sirius nodded sagely before suddenly shouting, "Harry James Potter, what in the name of Havens possessed you to cut your wrists? If I weren't dead, I would kill you myself! What do you think you're leaving behind? People care about you Harry, and how would it make them feel if you ended your life? Take Minerva… While you're at Hogwarts, she is your guardian as your Head of House. How do you think she would feel if you killed yourself while she was supposed to be watching out for you?"

Harry was stuttering to answer. "I… I… I dunno… I guess she'd just move on…"

Sirius snorted. "Move on? Harry, she'd just about _die._ Looking after kids like you is her life. She loves all of you more than an of you would ever imagine, I think."

"I didn't know, alright! I just wanted to be with you and Mom and Dad again, Sirius. I miss you so much… and… I needed to apologize."

"Apologize for what, Harry?" Sirius asked, although he thought he knew and dreaded the answer.

Harry mumbled something under his breath. "I'm sorry, I didn't hear that. Could you repeat it Harry?"

Harry nodded and took a deep breath before replying, "I'm sorry I got you killed. If it hadn't been for me, you wouldn't have died. So I'm sorry I murdered you. You too Cedric." Harry nodded towards the other boy. "I just needed to be with you, to do something for you to forgive me." At this point Cedric bowed out of the conversation, leaving it to those who were closest to Harry.

Lily – who had been listening to all this – had tears running down her cheeks. She longed to pull her little boy into her arms and soothe and comfort him. But she couldn't. He had to learn this lesson all on his own.

James noticed his wife's discomfort and pulled her into his arms as he watched Sirius struggling to find the words to answer that. Sirius stood gaping for a moment longer before he exploded. "Harry, haven't you listened to anything I've said? I don't blame you for anything… You _didn't get me killed_. It was my own stupidity that sent me off haring to the Ministry. It was Snape's fault for not teaching you Occlumency. Hellfires, it's even Dumbledore's fault for keeping me locked up all year. If I haven't convinced you yet, I don't know what will. Just… just don't do anything that stupid again, okay? Promise me on your word of Honor."

"I promise Sirius. I give my word of Honor that I won't try to kill myself again. I give my word as a Herald- trainee."

"You're a what? A Herald? Why didn't you say anything?" Lily refused to stay silent any longer. "We've met some Heralds here in the Havens, and they're all remarkably chivalrous. Who Chose you?"

Harry blushed as he answered her question. "I didn't say anything because I didn't really think anything of it. And Atayla Chose me."

Lily smiled as she answered, "Well, where is she. I would like to meet her." Harry nodded before answering, "Well, she's still alive. In the real world, that is. She didn't come with me. Is that bad…?" He asked, seeing the darkening cloud on his mother's face.

"Not bad, exactly, but it means that she is using your bond to keep your body alive while your mind is here. It can severely weaken your bond, and…" She stopped, uncertain if it would be wise to impart this information to her son. He decided for her. "Go on. It could… what?"

"The strain could kill her, and both of you would die. You would probably be sent back because of your destiny, but she would remain here. Forever."

Harry frowned, the grimaced slightly as a lashing pain ran through his chest. The others must have seen his discomfort, because his father said, "Its already time, isn't it." No question, just a statement of one who already knew the answer.

:_Harry__, love, come back to me. Please __Chosen__! You have to come back! I cannot keep you alive much longer… Hurry back to me:_ Atayla's voice rang through his mind, layered with fear and pain.

"Go Harry. Take this and go." Lily took off her golden locket and handed it to him. "This will play the lullaby I sang to you when you were little. Now go Harry."

James spoke one last time. "And tell Severus we're sorry." Sirius nodded. "Tell him we were prats, and that we apologize. Now go!"

Harry ignored the tears streaming down his cheeks as he embraced them all. "I'll see you again, someday. Goodbye!"

_o0O0o_

Harry didn't return immediately to wakefulness. After he left his parents, he drifted in the emptiness, searching for a light to guide him home.

He didn't know how long he drifted, searching for something, anything… but what he found was not what he expected.

It came to him slowly, so faint at first he almost didn't notice. It was a scent, something spicy and warm… comforting, and calming. But it was also fiercely protective, and grew stronger over time.

Soon it was joined by the feel of cool pine needles against his skin, and the feel of freshly fallen snow, with all its promise for the future.

These two sensations were joined by one more, unlike the others in that it was growing fainter, not stronger… It was the feel of water, surrounding and bathing him in a wellspring of… some emotion he was not completely familiar with. It was something like the affection and friendship he shared with Ron and Hermione, but deeper… more… intimate. Like someone knowing everything about him, good and bad, faults and strengths, and still accepting him.

He needed to return to these three sensations… They were calling him, steadily growing more urgent. He grew closer, until he could go no further…

He could not advance.

He was trapped.

_o0O0o_

Severus ran over to the prostrate child and pushed both Kerowyn and the Healer away as Harry moaned and began to open his eyes. The boy looked so… so something… Severus could not define how Harry looked. Desperate, perhaps, or… or reluctant? Like only a very small part of him was present…

"Harry, youngling. Look at me. That's right, don't go back to sleep yet. Can he be moved yet?" Severus addressed his question to the young Healer. She nodded, and he scooped Harry into his arms as he mindcalled Atayla. _Atayla__, can you carry him to the __Collegium_ The Companion nodded, and kneeled so Severus could easily put Harry on her back. He quickly mounted Terio, and helped the Healer to mount behind him. "Where to?" He asked over his shoulder as Terio and Atayla ran at the speed only Companions could accomplish.

"Out of the Field, then a left to the Collegium entrance. There is a suite for Heralds just inside on the right. We're always prepared for any injuries Heralds may incur." Came the shouted answer.

Swifter than he could imagine, Terio skidded to a stop in front of the Collegium. Atayla pulled up just behind, and allowed her Chosen to be carried into the massive building. The Healer ran ahead as Severus carried Harry down the right-hand hallway. Soon, her head popped out of a door, and she called for Severus to lay Harry on the bed. Another Healer was already waiting, and his hands reached out to touch the boy.

Severus was quickly and quietly escorted out of the room. He asked the Healer, "What exactly is wrong with him? I thought it would be a simple matter to heal the cuts on his wrists…"

The Healer sighed and explained, "Normally, it would be pretty simple, but it is different for self-inflicted injuries. The injuries resist healing for some reason. On top of that, the child has a high fever and likely a case of pneumonia or bronchitis – something in his lungs. He was chilled, out in the weather for far too long, especially with his blood loss. The illness will slow the healing, and compounded with the self-inflicted injuries… We have one very sick little boy on our hands. Honestly, if he won't allow his body to heal… then it'll be too late for him. What is his name, by the way? I forgot to ask earlier."

Severus was stumped momentarily. 'Harry' was no name for a young lad from this land, so… "Arrigo. His name is Arrigo." He had to remember to tell Harry his new name. He belatedly remembered the other two… and sighed with relief. Both 'Ginevra' and 'Draco' would suffice.

Severus went into the foyer and sat on one of the provided cushions. He saw his Captain and Weaponsmaster enter, and motioned for her to join him. "How's the boy?" Kerowyn asked quietly.

Severus sighed. "He's stabilized for now, but he lost a lot of blood, and the Healers are worried that he may have pneumonia or bronchitis. His fever hasn't gone down any either… And the Healers are worried that he'll die if he doesn't allow his body to heal." He stopped and frowned slightly as Kerowyn laughed softly.

"Oh, Severus, you sound just like a worried father! It is so unlike you… forgive me; I couldn't help but laugh…" Kerowyn quickly brought herself under iron control. "Thank you. These are dark times, and I needed a laugh. I am sorry that it was at your expense. And I am sorry that you bear such grim news."

Severus allowed the corners of his mouth to turn up very briefly. "Think nothing of it. I am glad you still find me as amusing as ever. Some of my students, however, would heartily disagree with you."

"I can't see why. You seem to be the same fun- loving, lively young man I know."

Severus smiled grimly. "When Mira died, the bond-breaking left its mark on me. I neither smiled nor laughed for nearly all the time I was gone. I was changed, empty, and I thought I would never feel again. I was like that for twenty long years. I did start to feel again, though. Revenge, Hatred… I wanted to make sure no one would be able to hurt me again. I was angry and bitter… I will never be able to atone for what I did. Then last night… Terio came. You can guess the rest... He was my savior, rescuing me from the darkness I had fallen into."

"I can only imagine, youngling, what you must have gone through. But you're here now, and you're no longer alone." Kerowyn comforted her friend and fellow Herald.

"But Kero… Don't you understand? I turned away from everything Heralds stand for. I don't deserve to be one any longer… Terio…"

Kerowyn raised her voice as she interrupted, "Terio Chose you anyway! He wouldn't have Chosen you if you didn't still have the makings of a Herald. Severus, you served with me since you were _eight._ I know you inside and out… what other lad would have been as good a Scout at that age? I trained you; I commanded you… Damn, Sev! Stop blaming yourself for the problems of the world and go to Terio! Your bond needs to be formed properly!"

Severus made to protest before resigning himself. "Just… inform me if anything happens… either way…" Kerowyn nodded her acceptance as Severus walked out the door.

She murmured softly to herself as she watched her young friend walk slowly out the door. "I am glad you're here, Severus. You have no idea how much we've missed you… or how much Valdemar needs you right now." She shifted to a more comfortable position and dozed, waiting for news from the Healers… one way or the other.

End Chapter


	4. Meet the Natives

_What Happened Last Time: _

_She murmured softly to herself as she watched her young friend walk slowly out the door. "I am glad you're here, Severus. You have no idea how much we've missed you… or how much __Valdemar__ needs you right now." She shifted to a more comfortable position and dozed, waiting for news from the Healers… one way or the other._

Severus strode into the Companion's Field to an unfamiliar- but not entirely unexpected- sight… The two children that had accompanied the dark man walked quietly with their Companions through the field.

_:Let's__ join them, Chosen. They'll do you __good.:_Severus nodded his head imperceptibly as he mounted his Companion and rode bare-back towards his two charges.

Just Before

Ginny and Draco rode their Companions away from the horrific scene that was the entrance to this strange new world, they remained silent, contemplating this place and examining their new friends… their Companions.

Rexera and Polath carried their Chosen to the Collegium and agreed that Rexera would call Rolan to alert his Chosen… Queen's Own Talia. He responded with all speed, and soon he and his partner met them at the Gate.

As Talia peered at the two new Herald- trainees, she took in the Outlandish clothes, and unkempt appearances. She sent a probe of mainly curiosity to her Companion, who answered with reassurance but also warned caution.

She sent a mental question. _:As__ bad as I was:_ Rolan sent an answering affirmative, tinged with _worse_.

Talia slowly let out a probe to the newcomers, and to her surprise, she met strong walls in both of the children's minds. The boy narrowed his eyes and pushed her out of his mind.

"I would thank you not to do that again. I have been trained to prevent any invasion." He spoke coldly. The girl turned to look at him, then glared at Talia as she, too, raised strong barriers around her mind. Not even surface thoughts or emotions got through…

_:What__ happened to these children that they would be trained in mind-magic? What need would there have been for them to guard their mind so powerfully:_

Rolan answered, even though her question hadn't been directed at him. He sent a probe of images about the younglings directly into her mind. She was assaulted by images of fear, and anger. Familiar feelings of self-doubt and guilt battered her mind. Two images in particular stuck out to her… one each of the boy and girl.

_The girl was in a dark room, massive, speaking to an enormous snake in an unusual language that sent tremors down Talia's back. Even though she could not understand the content of the 'conversation,' she __could feel the conflicting emotions in the girl… Guilt, Hatred, and overwhelming Despair… And above all, a foreign feeling of desiring revenge…_

_The Boy sat shirtless; chained to a wall in a dank, festering dungeon. A pale man with long blonde hair of the same pale shade as the boy's towered over him, holding a horsewhip in one hand and a wooden stick in the other. The word 'wand' suddenly drifted into her mind. "We must break your defiant spirit, boy." At this he grinned maliciously. "This is how it will go… I will ask you questions, and when you tell me the right answer, I will heal one injury. Answer me wrongly, and you will be whipped. Are we clear?" The boy nodded weakly, and said, "Father, please… I won't speak to her again! I'm sorry!" He yelped as the whip sang, and added another shallow cut to the many already littering his arms. "You will not speak unless spoken to! Is that __understood!__" The boy vigorously nodded, and the scene faded out…_

Talia swiftly shielded herself against the images, instinctively putting up the strongest mental barriers she could. Nothing could have blocked her bond with Rolan, but it painted him a clear picture of how distressed she was…

He quickly sent a probe through their bond tinged with sorrow. He hadn't meant to distress her, and he sent soothing and calmness to her as his apology.

Talia brought herself under control, and looked at the children in a new light. _No,_ she corrected herself,_ not really children. They never had a chance to just be children… to simply enjoy being young._

Talia sighed, inwardly close to weeping, but keeping herself under tight control.

"Come with me. We'll set you up for classes and chores, and then… we'll see after that, okay?"

She turned to lead the two inside, before Rolan stopped her. "What is it _this_ time, Rolan?" She turned to face the two again and stood, open-mouthed in shock and- in no small part- in horror.

"Severus! But… you're dead!"

o0O0o

Harry still could not find a way forward, out of the place he was trapped in. He was pretty sure it was somewhere in his mind, but how can a person be trapped inside themselves?

The sensation of water gently running around him was still fading, and the other two sensations were growing more distant…

If he did not find a way out soon, he feared what would happen.

o0O0o

He rubbed the back of his head awkwardly as he answered. "Reports of my demise may have been… exaggerated." He sighed.

Talia stood shocked for a moment, but after a mental nudge from Rolan, she stepped forward and embraced him. Neither Severus, uncomfortable though he was, nor Talia noticed the shocked looks on Draco and Ginny's faces; their hated potions professor was allowing a strange woman to embrace him… and he looked to be relaxing into it!

Talia quickly felt their discomfort and embarrassment, and pulled away from Severus.

"Where have you been? We searched for you and for Mira, but..." She stopped abruptly; there was no mistaking the pain he emanated when he thought of his former Companion. "Sorry, heart-sib, I won't ask. But why..." She studied him intently for a moment. "I sincerely hope that blood isn't all yours. Honestly, I know you were a mercenary, but did you have to pick up their bathing habits, or rather, lackthereof?" She teased him gently, provoking a smile that once again shocked his pupils.

"Not all. Actually, not even most. These two came with me, along with a third. He is at the Healer's Collegium, receiving treatment."

"Brother?" Talia saw the pain in his eyes, and was frustrated that she could not do more to help. She reached out a hand, and when Severus took it, she reached into him with her Gift, easing his pain and soothing his weariness. Talia lessened the immense burden of guilt Severus carried, but it would take more time to completely heal it. She removed the last knot of bitterness, and completed the rest of the emotional healing Terio had already begun.

Severus slowly relaxed under her ministrations, and as he relaxed, he began to talk.

"When I first met the boy, I was struck immediately by his resemblance to his father, James. I had met James very soon after I entered that world, too soon after Mira…" He took a deep breath, strengthening himself. "He was… not kind, at first. He soon learned that I responded in kind to his taunts, and our rivalry was quickly born. Few people know that the family that found me were related to James… the couple were barren, and until I came along, James was their favorite nephew. When we met, he was already predisposed against me for usurping what he saw as his place. I was still grieving for Mira, and the first words out of his mouth were, 'So, someone die?' When I nodded, he demanded the story, and when he learned that Mira was, in his eyes, a mere horse, he ridiculed me for becoming so attached to an animal."

"He was brought up in a society, you see, where animals and servants, and even a number of his peers were seen as less desirable members of community; a necessary evil, if you will." He glanced at Draco, encouraged by the attentive look on the boy's face. Ginevra's face was a study in shock. No doubt, James Potter had always been held up as a paragon of light and justice.

"We attended the same school, and sometime during those years, he changed. I think it must have been because he fell in love… Overnight, it seemed, he changed his act. He even asked me to forgive him, once, but by then I had allowed my anger and hurt to fester too long." Severus' face turned sheepish. "I turned him down, and I remained his rival."

"When I saw the boy, I remembered only the hurt his father had caused me, and I am sorry to say my behavior was abominable. As soon as he awakens, I fully intend to apologize to him, now that I am returned to my true self."

Talia nodded. "That will bring healing for both you and him; it is a good idea."

Severus nodded. "Shall we see about classes now? And perhaps… Since I am much older than is typical of the newly-Chosen, perhaps I might be allowed a private room, instead of dorming with the rest of the trainees?"

Talia smiled and nodded. "Something will be arranged. Now, I am sure Gaytha will remember you…"

Severus groaned, but in good humor. "I'm sure… that woman never forgets a face…"

"A bargain: while I take these two to Teren, you stop by and see Gaytha, grab a snack, and join us at the Dean's office."

Severus nodded. "Until then." And he started to walk away, leaving Draco and Ginny in Talia's more than capable hands.

"Well, then… shall we go?" She said, and motioned for the two new trainees to follow her.

o0O0o

"So, you both are poorly lacking in any real form of defense… they'll have to see Alberich personally, and soon." Dean Teren remarked to Talia.

"Also, you need Geography, Religions, Maths, Grammar courses, and Basic Sciences, along with Orientation and Equitation, of course."

Draco and Ginny sat dazed, marveling that the classes they took at Hogwarts seemed so trivial and useless now.

"And I have to ask, are either of you mage-Gifted?"

Draco and Ginny looked at each other, confused, before Draco turned back and asked, "Do you mean magic? Real magic, not just these mind-Gifts?"

"If you want to put it that way, then yes."

Draco and Ginny smiled, relieved. Perhaps their education wasn't completely useless, after all.

"Yes, we both are magical. We've had some schooling in it, too… since we were children."

"Excellent! What class are you then? Probably still journeyman, but maybe…Has your school offered the Mastery exam to you yet?"

Draco choked, and gulped in a breath of air before answering. "Mastery! That's years away! I mean, Severus just got his Mastery a few years ago!"

"Severus? Severus is mage-Gifted?" Talia asked, a little surprised.

"Yes… you didn't know?"

"No… the Mage Collegium is quite new… I'll tell Gaytha to assign you the correct uniform…" Talia stopped when she saw their once-again-confused faces.

"All collegiums students take classes together: Herald, Healer, Bardic, and Mage. There is also a group of students unassociated with any collegiums, the Unaffiliates. Each group wears a different uniform, to aid the instructors in telling them apart. For instance, a teacher would never assign a Bardic student to do something that may damage his hands; it could set his training back for quite a while. Heralds wear white, trainees wear grey. Healers wear a dark green, students a light green. Bards wear scarlet, the trainees wear rust-red. Unaffiliates wear blue. Mages wear either the colors of their school or a golden-brown; their students wear pale yellow."

"Until recently, it was quite simple. However, then a group of mage-students were Chosen. They, like you, wear the grey Herald-trainee uniform, but wear yellow trim with it to signify their status."

The two youths sat back in their chairs, a little overwhelmed. Teren noticed their blank faces and smiled.

"Don't worry, it gets easier. To begin with, you will have only three classes: Orientation, Weapons-work, and Equitation. Once you finish Orientation, other classes will be added gradually, until you have a full load. I think that's enough for tonight. Talia, do you want to take Ginevra, and I will wait with Draco for Severus to arrive?"

"Sure, Dean. I'll see you after Council?"

Teren nodded, and Talia led Ginny out the door.

o0O0o

Atayla worried for her Chosen; she could feel his fear, knew he was trapped, and she couldn't do a thing about it. And what was worse, was that his presence was growing weaker in her mind… drifting away… it angered her that nobody seemed to notice…

If something didn't happen soon, if someone didn't see…

It would be too late.


	5. The Shadow Lover

**If you just got to this chapter, go back and re-read the rest... I've updated and edited nearly everything. If you've read this from the beginning, enjoy this next chapter!**

Chapter Five

Several days later, they were still awaiting positive word of Harry's injuries. So far there had been no change, and none of them were sure if that was to the good or not.

Draco and Ginny had technically started their Orientation class, but neither could bear to be far from the Healer's Collegium… just in case.

"I don't know why I even do this, Sev… It's not like we were friends or anything." The silver-haired boy confessed to his godfather.

"But you are both Heralds now; what happened in the past no longer matters. Being Heralds together, especially being year-mates, includes the both of you in a special group not unlike a family. Our Companions bind us together, so that if ever one of us needs the other, the Companions are able to communicate that somehow. Somehow, they can sense our needs, and if another Herald can fill those needs, they will be brought together. Ask Talia about it; she experienced something similar several times during the course of her trainee years. Also…" Sev trailed off, holding Draco's gaze with his dark eyes.

"What?" Draco fidgeted nervously under the heavy gaze.

"Talia's main Gift is empathy; you might have a touch of it, too...just enough to make you sensitive to such things."

Draco glanced at his godfather and mentor. "Nice try, but I want to talk about Har… er… Arrigo."

Severus clutched dramatically at his heart, groaning, "Oh, Draco, you wound me!" Draco gave a startled laugh, and smiled.

_:You__ need it, too, Chosen… someone must deflate your ego; it's so large, his help will be welcome!:_

"Let me guess… you're speaking to Terio again." Draco's smile had left his face.

"Your bond with Polath still hasn't opened enough for you to speak?" Severus asked sympathetically.

"Not yet… I don't understand!" Draco suddenly burst out. "I can feel our bond getting stronger; every time I'm with her, it grows. But…" The anger drained out of him. "I just want to talk to her, Sev… Teren said my Gift was Mindspeech, or else I wouldn't have heard Atayla's call from such a distance." The exhausted child was close to tears before Severus realized something.

"Draco, how are your shields?"

Draco looked askance at Severus. "Why are we talking about dueling when Harry's almost dying?"

"Not those shields, your mindshield."

Draco checked, and was surprised to see them all out of whack. "Weakened, and off their foundation."

Severus nodded. "I thought so. You're probably picking up the emotions of the patients in the Collegium; that's why you're being so emotional. When you built your Occlumency shields, you first had to create a base for them in your mind through certain exercises, right?"

"Yeah… where are you going with this?"

"Here, in Velgarth, that foundation can actually be a bad thing… Let's head outside, and I'll show you how to ground and center."

Draco nodded and stood, not realizing that his godfather had successfully manipulated him into forgetting about his friend for a short time.

He followed his godfather outside and into the Companion's field. Their Companions met them on the way, but neither mounted, preferring instead to walk side-by-side with one hand resting on their respective guardian's shoulder.

Severus broke the silence when they reached a small creek with a grassy embankment. "Grounding and Centering isn't that difficult; it just takes practice. You start with finding yourself, and pulling all of yourself into one place; you will know when you have it right."

He took in the confused look on Draco's face. "Would it help if I showed you?" Draco nodded.

"All right. You'll feel me at your Occlumency barrier. Relax, and follow my mental hand."

Draco nodded his understanding, and waited. He felt his godfather brush along his mental barrier, and _reached_. Severus grabbed him, and led Draco to his center. There was a bright, glowing figure easily recognizable as his godfather, shielded, but not entirely cut off… just… controlled. The glow was centered around his mind and hands, but threads ran throughout his whole body and down into the ground. Draco touched one of the threads leading into the earth, and was instantly energized. Severus, however, grunted and almost immediately released Draco.

"Don't do that!" Severus ground out between gritted teeth and gasping breaths.

'I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you… honestly! Here… Take it back!" Draco reached for his godfather's hand.

"No!" Severus pulled away, and Draco let his outstretched arm fall. He dropped his head.

Severus sighed, and stepped forward again, reaching to lift Draco's chin. "Childing, listen to me. I want you to promise you won't do that again until you've had more training."

Draco nodded.

"Swear it!"

"I swear it! On my honor!"

"Swear it on your honor as a Herald-trainee!"

"Sev, why?"

"Just do it!"

"I so swear on my honor, as a Herald-trainee, that I will not attempt to do what I just did until I have received further training. So I speak, So I intend…"

"And so let it be done." Severus finished, and slowly relaxed his hold on Draco's chin.

"Draco, what you just did has killed more people than you know."

"What was it?"

"You drained some of my magic, and added it to your own reserve."

"But, but I don't even know how to do that!"

"Which is exactly why it was so dangerous! You could have drained me dry and burned yourself out all in one go. It is that very technique that blood-path sorcerers use to harness the life-force of their victims. It is very dangerous, and easily misused."

"I'm sorry Sev… I would never…"

"I know that."

"I'm not like… like… Him!"

_:We__ know, Chosen…:_ The words came to him faintly, as through some sort of barrier.

"Polath?"

His Companion came to his side and nodded her head.

"You… you spoke to me! You don't think I was… a… a mistake?"

Polath snorted vehemently, to show what she thought of _that_. She laid her head against his shoulder, as if to say, You are mine!

"Thank you." The boy whispered, and hugged her neck. She shifted, and pulled him closer.

Severus quietly withdrew. The lesson could wait for another day, and he had another child to check on.

o0O0o

Ginny sat outside Harry's room, awaiting word of her friend's condition. She had not slept the past two nights for more than a couple hours… _Candlemarks_, she reminded herself. If they were going to live and train in this world, she would have to get used to the terminology. She wondered briefly how long they would have to stay in this place, this Valdemar, before someone found the solution to get them home. But at the same time…

_Would it be so bad to stay here?_ She couldn't imagine living without Rexera; the Companion filled a piece of her that she had never noticed was wanting until it was filled. And Harry… She smiled fondly… She could just imagine his face, eyes bright, laughing… like he had been before Sirius had died. But even in his sorrow, there had been a quiet dignity to his face... a characteristic she greatly admired.

She shook her head. This wasn't the time for such thoughts… not while Harry was lying in a bed beyond that door, with the Healers unsure if he would ever awaken.

He has a good prognosis, they said. His body is recovering from the pneumonia and blood loss. He just hadn't woken up… She had this niggling feeling in the back of her mind, and tried very hard to not think about anything in particular, to let the idea come.

Harry hadn't woken up, but his body was physically fine… what about his mind? Could there be something wrong there?

Severus walked in and approached the girl, still trapped in her musings.

"Ginevra?"

She startled. "Professor!" He _looked_ at her, and she gave a small smile. "Severus, I mean…"

"Yes Ginevra?" He heard the door to Harry's room open to the side, but the girl didn't notice.

"Well… I was thinking…" She hesitated. As much as the man standing before her had changed, he was still her dreaded potions professor.

"Hm? About Arrigo, I presume."

Arrigo… Harry's new name was strange to her ears… almost as strange as her full name coming from this man's mouth.

"Yes… I know he's healing physically; his body is recovering and all that. But… what about his mind? I don't understand these new Gifts we're developing, but could they have an effect on why he hasn't woken up yet? And even back home, blood is tied strongly to someone's magic; that's why it's illegal. And Har- Arrigo lost a lot of blood, especially coming through that portal… So…"

Severus nodded thoughtfully. "Yes, I can see where you're coming from. But the chances are slim; most Heralds are checked over by a mind-healer as soon as they get here, especially if they possess strong Gifts."

It was then that Severus saw the Healer's white face behind Ginevra, shocked and a little embarrassed, like he had forgotten something extremely important.

"Ginevra. Why don't you take a walk with Rexera, then come find a couch to take a nap. I'm sure Atayla would like some company, if you would care to see her." Although phrased as a question, both adult and youth knew it was not.

The girl nodded her acceptance and walked out the door at the end of the hall.

"Healer, I fear the answer, but I must know… please tell me the boy had a mindhealer look at him."

The Healer shook his head nervously. "The boy is a mere novice! We assumed he was untrained… that his Gifts were not fully active yet! All that was mentioned when he was brought in were his wrists and signs of pneumonia. I swear to you, this was not intentional!"

Severus struggled to withstand the rage that was threatening to overwhelm him. "Well, what are you waiting for! Summon the nearest mindhealer, immediately!" The Healer nodded, and strode off to find someone.

_:Terio__, is Talia available? We might need her for this…:_

_:She__ is still in Council with the Queen, Chosen, and now is not a good time to disturb her…:_

_:What__ about __Atayla__? Can she give aid?:_

_:Chosen__, her strength is spent. She has been calling her Chosen's mind back from the darkness, and it has taxed her strength greatly. She has no more to __give.:_

_:Is__ there any other course of action I can take? Anything I can do?:_

_:Chosen__, I know you dislike feeling helpless, but you have done all you can. Now you must let the Healer do her job. Look, someone is coming even now.:_

The Healer was walking quickly back to Severus, his face now a study in worry. "Kaera is unavailable, and with Lana out on maternity leave, the only other option is Talia… would you mindcall her?"

A sinking feeling developed in the pit of Severus' stomach. "Herald Talia is in Council with the Queen; she is unavailable."

"Then I am afraid the child must hold on a little longer… unless…" The Healer trailed off.

"What?" Severus demanded.

"You are Gifted with Mindspeech, correct? You could try to call him…"

"I have not the skill, or the training necessary… I would not know how…"

"I will guide you as much as I am able. Come, you may be the child's last hope."

With that, the Healer led Severus into the room.

o0O0o

As Ginny lay in the soft grass, leaning against Rexera, she could no longer ignore her gut feeling. Something was telling her that somewhere, something very bad was about to happen.

"Rexera? Do you feel that?"

_:Yes__, Chosen. The world is waiting, poised to see what will happen next. For some reason, the injured child you came with is important enough for the very earth to wait to see his __fate.:_

"What do I do, Rexera? I… I am scared." She admitted, turning over to hide her face in the Companion's soft white mane.

_:Let__ us find __Atayla__. It is her Chosen, and if we can help her, we will indirectly help __him.:_

_Poor Child…_ thought the mare. _The hand of fate is heavy on this one__. Avatars, give her strength…_

o0O0o

Harry still drifted. Why had no one come looking for him yet? Was he of that little value?

Off in the distance, he heard a soft melody, heart-breakingly beautiful, haunting in its simplicity. Harry knew that he would never be able to forget this song, until the end of his days it would remain in his mind.

As it grew louder, Harry became aware of a beautiful girl, dancing to the music. As she danced closer, she beckoned to him, called him, commanded him to follow her.

Something in him didn't want to follow, was frightened of the consequences. But something else told him that she would give him the peace and rest he craved. That if he followed her, all cares would drop from his shoulders, all his burdens would be removed.

"You have come to take me away?" He asked. She nodded.

"And if I follow you, I will not return, will I." Again, she nodded.

All was silent except for that tune.

No one had come for him, and he could not escape… maybe it would be better if he followed her. Maybe this way was better.

"If I follow you, will you give me your name?" He asked. She smiled thoughtfully, then nodded.

"Then I will come."

"And I," said the girl, "am the Shadow Lover."


	6. Brotherhood

Chapter Six

The sight of Harry lying so still and pale on the bed shocked Severus. Having had little interaction with him over the summer, it was an unpleasant realization for the man to what extent Harry had neglected the care of his body.

Harry's skin was pasty white, excepting only his wrists, which were a vibrant red, swollen and inflamed. Beads of sweat decorated his brow, and he lay deathly still. At first glimpse, Severus thought he had come too late to save the child, but then he noticed the ever-so-slight rise and fall of his chest.

In order to do his job properly, Severus clamped down on his emotions; hands shaking in sorrow and a mind unfocused by anger would be no help to the boy.

"Explain to me, in detail, everything you know." Severus slipped into his professional persona; in order to gain Mastery in Potions, numerous healing courses were required, since that was primarily what his creations were used for.

"He came in with wrists slit, still bleeding. The cuts were perpendicular to the length of his arm, which is all that saved his life. Due to the blood loss, his immune system was compromised, and he contracted pneumonia. He was admitted with a 102.5 degree fever, which peaked at 105 degrees and later returned to 102 degrees. His body has not dropped below that temperature since he has been admitted."

"Very well. What have you dosed him with today?"

"Willow bark tea for the fever, Blue Vervain and Chamomile for strength in his lungs, Cayenne to circulate the blood and Dandelion to purify it, Comfrey and Chickweed for his lungs, Fenugreek to expel toxins from his body, Hawthorn to strengthen his spirit, Ginger to increase the effectiveness of the other infusions, and Mint and Licorice tea for general nutrition."

Severus nodded. "Later, we'll try Lobelia and Valerian for mental health."

The Healer nodded, and gestured to an aide to find the necessary herbs and to prepare them.

Severus pulled a stool up next to Harry's bed, and gently grabbed the boy's hand. He _reached,_ and was suddenly tugged in.

o0O0o

"You are Shadow Lover? What does that mean?"

The girl smiled demurely and shook her head.

"You can't tell me?"

She looked up at him, and then he noticed: her eyes were colorless, as if she were blind. Yet she stared directly at him!

"Do I follow you now?"

She nodded, and he felt strangely reluctant… Oh well, nobody had come looking for him… maybe they didn't miss him… Yes, it was better this way.

"Let's go." He said, and reached out a hand toward the dark girl.

o0O0o

Severus withdrew, profoundly baffled. "It's as though he was never there…" He spoke louder for the Healer's benefit. "I found no trace of him. No vestiges of personality, no evidence that this mind was ever even occupied. In fact… It's as though his mind was wiped…"

Severus moved to get up, and nearly collapsed. The Healer rushed to help him.

"You over-extended yourself." The Healer reprimanded gently as he aided Severus to a nearby lounge.

"I forgot how the reaction-headache feels…" Severus groaned quietly, but accepted the steaming mug from the Healer.

"I had it prepared after the second hour you were out. It has been some time since you exercised your Gift?"

Severus nodded and said, "My thanks." He gave no further explanation. He drank the foul content down to the dregs. "In total, how long was I out?"

"You were nearing the end of the fourth hour when you awoke. You said there was no trace of the boy?"

"None at all."

The Healer hesitated. "I one reminded: there is another, here at the palace, who is skilled in the healing of minds… would you accept her aid?"

"At this point, I will accept any aid for my student."

o0O0o

Draco wandered in the Companion's Field with Polath by his side. He was not paying attention to where they were walking, for his mind was concerned with other matters; namely, one Harry Potter.

He did not know why he suddenly wanted to get along well with Harry… Just as he had wanted Harry's friendship so badly when they had first met, Harry's refusal had wounded him to the core…

Harry was entirely different from Draco… They were, in fact, a study in contrast: day and night, light and dark. Draco was of the personal opinion that any artist would die to capture such a disparity with pen and ink…

More to the point, when he was around Harry, his soul felt… complete… much the way he felt around Polath…

…like Polath and Harry were the siblings he longed for, but had never owned…

…as if they were brothers…

Draco looked around, suddenly aware of his surroundings. He and Polath stood directly in front of the archway that had been their entrance into this world. He was about to walk away when he noted the bloodstains on the ancient stone… Harry's blood.

Draco made a swift decision, and acted on it before his better senses pulled him back.

He reached to his belt and pulled out the small eating knife he had been given years ago… it never left his person, and was his last line of defense… It was a gift from his mother, and was a Black family heirloom… it had once belonged to her cousin…

Draco made a shallow cut on his palm, and allowed his blood to drip onto the dried remains of Harry's.

"Brother to brother, our lives entwined." He intoned solemnly. It was a basic pureblood ritual, in essence swearing brotherhood and fidelity. It wasn't permanently binding; he wanted Harry to have the option to remove it if the notion was so repugnant to him… but in Draco's mind, they were now as good as brothers.

Draco had always wanted a brother or sister, and now he had found one for himself, he was unwilling to let him slip from his grasp.

He turned around and began to head back toward the Healer's Collegium.

o0O0o

As Ginny lay with Rexera and Atayla, her thoughts were also centered on a certain brunette.

"I don't understand it!" She suddenly burst out. "I've accepted that I like him, and I think he might even like me… but…" She stopped, frustrated. This depth of feeling was completely foreign to her, and it unnerved her. She was unused to her emotions acting of their own accord.

"Why do I feel so shameless around him? We're too young… I'm too young… to want… that…" She blushed red as her hair.

The Companions exchanged an odd look above her head. Maybe something should be done about this situation.

Atayla quietly rose and began to walk toward the Healer's collegiums. Something momentous would occur soon, and the Earth quivered with anticipation.

Only a few moments later, a restless Ginny followed the Companion's path.

o0O0o

The Healer nodded, and moved to open the door. In stepped the most outlandish person Severus had ever seen; stranger even than Kero's Shin'a'in cousins. Her hair was mottled brown and silver, and two white owls rested on her shoulders. One flew from her shoulder, and perched on the back of the chair set nearest Harry's head. She raised an eyebrow, but made no comment.

Severus took that moment to observe her. Her white hair belied her age; on close inspection, Severus could tell she was no older than her mid-thirties. Her clothes were mottled grays, greens, browns, and whites much like her hair. Her nose had obviously been broken in the past, but it added character to her face instead of detracting from her beauty. And she was very beautiful…

"Zhai'helleva." Severus bowed his head, saluting the Hawkbrother in her own tongue.

"And to yours. This boy is the patient?" Severus nodded, and backed away to allow the imposing woman to take his spot by the bed.

She moved forward, and began to explain what she was going to do. "I am going to check the condition of his channels; the avenues from which we can control our gifts. I am told the boy had an experience remarkably similar to Herald Vanyel's; if the results are the same, the boy may experience some discomfort or pain when I probe him. Do not be alarmed if he reacts."

She placed a delicate hand on his forehead, and closed her eyes. It was some time later that she opened them, and moved away from the bed with a stoic expression on her unsmiling face. Harry had not even twitched during the entire examination.

"The boy has no channels to speak of. Whatever Gifts he had he no longer possesses. If he lives (and I am amazed he is still alive) he will never learn any of your Heraldic gifts." She paused a moment to let the tidings sink in.

"I am going to send a deep-probe into his mind. If I can reach him, I will inform him of the state of things, and give him the choice to return or not. If he chooses to return to this world, I will do my best to draw him through any barriers in his path. If he does not desire to remain in this world, I will ease his passage into the next."

Once again, Severus watched helplessly as she placed her hand on his child's forehead and closed her eyes. It was only a few moments later that she violently threw herself away from the bed.

Severus quickly moved to her aid. "The child is no longer in this world; his mind was filled with the presence of the Shadow Lover. There is nothing I, nor anyone else, can do." She stated quietly, not lifting her chin.

She looked up into his face as she said, "I am sorry for the loss of your son. Without his mind to give life to his body, it will slowly shut down and eventually die."

Severus was so shocked by the news, he neglected to correct her misunderstanding of the relationship between himself and Harry. His thoughts were centered on the other two children who had come through the Gate with him.

Ginevra and Draco both had attached themselves to Harry, whether they realized it or not. Severus had his suspicions about the depth of the bond Ginevra and Harry shared… for Ginevra to pine after Harry for nearly as long as she had known him was an incredible feat. Draco's fixation on Harry since they had arrived in Velgarth was no less troubling; if their souls had been bound together in any way, the two children were in for a world of pain at Harry's passing.

o0O0o

By some coincidence, Draco, Ginny, their Companions, and Atayla managed to arrive at the Collegium at nearly the same moment. They looked at each other for a brief second, before splitting into two groups. The three Companions took off in search of Rolan, and Draco and Ginny entered the Collegium together.

A comfortable silence lasted between the two humans until Draco broke it. "I swore brotherhood to Harry." He said quietly. "I would swear it with you if you desire."

Ginny's face went slack with shock for a brief moment; one of the richest heirs in the wizarding world offered to bind himself to her – the youngest child of a poor family - in brotherhood. She gathered her wits, and prepared to answer.

"I thank you, Draco." She said formally. "I will enter into this covenant with you."

_What are you doing?_ A more sensible part of her asked. _You don't even know the type of oath you're about to swear!_

_Oh, hush!_ The more daring part of her answered.

"Draco took out a small knife, and cut a shallow crescent in his left palm; he passed the knife to her, and she mimicked his actions. He extended his hand, and Ginny hesitated. This was her last chance to back out…

She shoved the hesitating part of her aside, and grasped his hand.

"As a man, I come to this woman seeking kinship. I seek a family to call my own; I forsake my past to enter her family. Will she accept me?" He intoned.

This was one of the pureblood rituals all families were familiar with; it allowed a person to leave their family for any reason and petition to be brought into another. Their request may be turned down, but that often wasn't the case, from pity if nothing else. For if the family rejected the plea, that petitioner would be as dead to the pureblood society (or at least would have as little status as a muggleborn).

In Draco's case, this would not make him a Weasley of any sort; he would simply be Ginny's brother, given the same status as a very good friend if the rest of her family chose not to complete the ritual with him.

"This man comes before me, seeking kinship with me. He forsakes all ties to his family, and is in turn accepted as my brother. Though I cannot speak for the remainder of my kin, I claim this man, Draco, as my brother, bound with my blood. Let him no longer yearn for family, for he has found it in me. So I speak, so I intend…"

"So let it be done." They intoned the final phrase together.

"Welcome, brother." Ginny embraced her new heart-brother.

"Good to be here, Sister. Now," He smirked. "Let's go check on this ailing brother of ours."

Ginny smiled, for once in complete agreement.

"Indeed."


	7. Sad Tidings and Grief

Chapter Seven

As Harry laid his hand in that of the beautiful maiden before him, he felt all previous sensations stop… As he was led forward, he first left the pine needles behind, as if the forest he was passing through suddenly ceased. For some time he could still feel the water and smell the spices, but gradually those too faded; the spices first, then the water.

It was painful when at last he no longer knew anything apart from the girl beside him; the places in his heart that once had been full were now emptied and barren.

"Good-bye." He whispered quietly, and allowed the Shadow Lover to lead him in a dance to the tune of that haunting melody.

o0O0o

_:Good-bye.:_

It came quietly into Ginny's heart, as a whisper borne by the wind. It left, however, little doubt to its meaning. Tears began to roll down her face, and as she felt something drain from her heart, she collapsed in the hallway in Draco's arms.

Draco, for his part, also felt it when Harry embraced Death. His new-found brother quietly slipped away from Draco's heart, leaving behind a void that Draco knew would never be filled.

As soon as she felt Harry's death, Atayla screamed, tore herself away from Rexera and Polath, and bolted back to the Healer's Collegium. She ran into the entryway, shoved her way past the people in the door, and did not stop until she came to Harry's room. It was there that she gave a low groan, and allowed herself to sink to the floor.

Severus pulled a white sheet up over his pupil's face, tears streaming down his own. The Hawkbrother and Healer both stood to the side, allowing him a moment to realize the truth.

And then, a bell tolled.

o0O0o

All Heralds know when another dies, and the manner of their death. It came as a shock to most, who were unaware that such a child had even been Chosen.

Never before had a child been Chosen only to die less than a week later.

Normally, only a very few of those closest to the Herald see anything about the Herald's passing, but this night, all Heralds viewed the events leading up to Harry's tragic death.

Queen Selenay, King Daren, Queen's Own Talia, and Weaponsmaster Alberich, once ensconced in Council, saw nearly every moment of the young man's life; from his parent's early death, through his years with an abusive and neglectful family, to his arrival at Hogwarts, and all his yearly adventures from then on.

The only Heralds spared witnessing the story of Harry's life were those already familiar with him: Severus, Ginny, and Draco. The Powers spared them the agony of watching the boy they cared for die when they had each already felt it.

o0O0o

The wake took place that night, after the Healers had bound his wrists with clean linen, and dressed him in a Trainee's uniform. All Heralds filed past the pedestal he had been placed on, honoring their fallen comrade. Severus, Draco, and Ginny were last in line, and once Ginny had seen the body, she collapsed, and refused to be moved from her beloved's side.

Only when Severus and Draco came the next day to take Harry's body to the pyre would she allow herself to move, and then it was only to accompany him.

The Queen presided at the funeral, giving a brief view of Harry's life, of all he had accomplished. Only Kero, Alberich, and the Royal Couple attended besides the inter-dimensional travelers. Funerals were traditionally private, and these people were the closest to Harry, and to Harry's new family.

"May he find peace in death, as he never found in life." Selenay closed.

As Draco approached the pyre with the torch, Severus laid his hand upon Ginny's shoulder. He was afraid of any notions the heartbroken girl may have of joining her beloved.

"Fly free, ashke." Ginny whispered.

They did not hear her speak again.

It was not until the pyre had died down to ashes and the people were turning away that they realized every Companion whose Heralds were living at the palace, or close enough to come, were present at the funeral. They formed a living barrier around the pyre, in a perfect circle. Once the people began to move, so too did the Companions leave to return to either their Heralds or their business.

Ginny did not move. She stayed by the pyre until even the ashes were cold. Only then did she leave, sandwiched between Atayla and Rexera.

o0O0o

For the next week, Ginny and Rexera stayed with Atayla, even sleeping in her stall at night. Ginny seemed to draw strength from Atayla's presence, and vice versa.

Then, for no apparent reason, Atayla vanished. The Collegium gave over one day to look for her body, for it was assumed that she had followed her Herald, but her body was not found.

Ginny continued to sleep in the stables with Rexera; even Draco came down to visit her occasionally during the next few days.

o0O0o

Several days after Atayla disappeared, Ginny sat in a chair in Teren's office; he leaned against the desk in front of her, and Severus watched her from his post by the door.

"Do you know why I have called you here, Ginevra?" Teren asked the silent girl. She shook her head.

"We are worried for you." He paused to see if that would spark some sort of reaction. He sighed when it did not.

Severus stepped forward and knelt in front of her. He took her hands in his and gently spoke. "Ginevra, we know this is difficult for you. But Harry would not want you to spend your days wasting away. Do you remember how you refused to leave him be this summer? His actions were the same as yours are now, and you refused to allow him to waste away. Do you think he loved you any less than you love him? Do you think he would want you to spend your life this way, when there is a better path?"

_:Chosen, please listen to them. They speak the truth.:_ But Ginny didn't respond to either her teacher or her Companion.

She did, however, go to her equitation class the next day, as well as the private lessons she and Draco took from Severus.

o0O0o

A week after Atayla disappeared, Ginny was awoken by a strange tremor in the air. Something was about to occur, and she was drawn to it.

She left the stable, and followed her feelings as they led her to the Grove. The air wavered, and through the archway, a ghostly being emerged. At this distance, Ginny could not make out any shape or figure, and her heart began to beat with hope. She began to run toward the Grove.

She arrived just in time to see a figure step out of the air.

It was not Harry. Her heart fell.

It was, however, something familiar…

…A Companion…

It was Atayla! But… she had changed… There was another facet to her… something otherworldly… as if a part of her had passed beyond the void, and all that was visible in this world was the remnant.

Ginny gave a very small smile, and led the obviously exhausted Atayla back toward the stable.

Atayla fell into a deep sleep almost immediately.

Ginny, however, took longer to cry herself to sleep.

o0O0o

"The first thing I will teach you is the Animagus transformation. It will be very different from anything you are used to, which is why most wizards find it difficult. We will start with scrying for your inner animal. For this part, I have called in a friend. Her Gifts are Fetching, FarSeeing, and FutureSeeing. With this combination, she is somehow able to look _beyond_, and see things about people they themselves do not know. Hopefully, this will give us some clue as to what animal you will turn in to. Kora?"

A woman stepped out of the shadows, startling Draco. If Ginny was surprised, she gave no indication of it.

"If you would please relax you shields?" She requested as she entered trance-state.

Draco and Ginny complied silently.

"The young man is easy enough… He is cunning, wily, and clever. He is fiercely protective of his own, and loyal to those who earn his respect… a canine of some sort… my guess would be a fox." Draco nodded and thanked her.

She smiled and turned her gaze to Ginny. She quickly lost her smile as she gazed on Ginny's aura. "Child, part of you is no longer in this world… As if you belong in another realm… I have never before seen… Your form is that of a Companion." She finished shortly, and came out of trance.

"Severus, if you will join me in the hall?" She gestured, and led the man outside.

"Would you care to tell me why that girl is suffering from a broken lifebond?"

Severus sighed. "So they were lifebonded? I was afraid of that…"

"Yes… and if a mindhealer, preferably Talia, does not see her, her grief will consume her and she will shortly join her love."

"I will see to it. Thank you, Kora."

"It is nothing old friend… although I must admit, I have never before used my Gift in such a way."

"It made things much easier for them. Is there anything…?"

"Just make sure that girl sees Talia, soon."

"It will be done."

o0O0o

"Ginny? Please look at me." Talia lifted the girl's chin and looked into her eyes.

She reached for her bond with her Companion, asking for his strength and aid to bring healing.

She probed the girl's mind, sending healing for the almost-physical pain the girl was in. She eased knots of grief, released misery, banished melancholy… She tried to give life to the girl, but Ginny refused to grasp for something worth living for.

She refused to cling to duty or faith or responsibility, or even love to give her purpose… It was as if without Harry, Ginny had lost her capacity to love, and had shut down emotionally. If only Talia could give Ginny hope again…

Suddenly an idea came to her.

"Ginevra? I was informed this morning that a Companion mare has become pregnant. I would like it if you could care for her during her pregnancy, and during the foal's early days. Will you do this for me?"

Ginny remained still for a moment, then nodded her acceptance of her task.

Talia sighed, pleased. "Thank you. The mare is familiar to you, I think: Atayla. Rexera will help you find her today, and you two can work out a system of check-ups. Keren will supervise you."

Maybe this foal was just what Atayla and Ginny both needed to encourage them to live.

o0O0o

Draco was settling in to the Collegium routine well. He attended his classes with Natalia, Aleto, Connor, and Loreli. They, along with Ginny, were his year-mates. Ginny, however, refused to come to the vast majority of their classes, and was quickly falling behind.

The classes were very different from the Hogwarts curriculum, and Draco found he enjoyed the difference. His classes were divided into two categories: academic and athletic.

His favorite academic classes were History of Valdemar and Introductory Sciences. Sciences was interesting... a little like potions: this item is formed from this, and when combined with that item, it forms that. However, he had not expected History to be as interesting to him as it was, and he remembered with joy his first class.

o0O0o

_"Who knows the story of the founding of __Valdemar__?" Teren, their teacher, asked._

_Nobody raised their hands, but Natalia, Connor, and Aiden smiled. Apparently, this story was well-liked._

_"Very well, I will tell it again._

_"__Baron __Valdemar__ led a group of refugees away from the civil war of a grand empire. Once they felt they had reached a safe distance, the people stopped, and made their own country, and chose __Valdemar__ to be their King._

_"Now, King __Vlademar__ ruled justly and well, but as he was coming to the end of his days, he realized something: he had ruled his people well, and he knew his son and heir would follow in his steps, but not all of his descendants would rule so well._

_"So __Valdemar__ went into a chapel, and prayed in that chapel for three days, calling on all the gods he and his people had ever heard of to give his country a way to make sure all their rulers would be just and kind._

_"His answer came at dusk of the third day in the form of the first Companion. It chose him, and was followed__by two more who chose his son and his Chief Herald (which in those days was just an office, like a messenger)._

_"King __Valdemar__ passed a law, proclaiming that only a Herald could rule, and if the Heir was not Chosen, they would never reign._

_"And so it passed that more Companions came from the Grove surrounding the Chapel; indeed, all Companions were Grove-born in those days… This differs from modern times, where only the Monarch's __Own's__ Stallion – __Rolan__ – is Grove-born._

_"Now, there came the day that King __Valdemar__ died, and upon his passing, the bell in the chapel rang out. This was the Death Bell, which tolls whenever a Herald dies. Some time ago the actual bell was removed, but still it tolls__… No one knows how._

_"And that is the tale as it was told me, of the founding of __Valdemar__." Teren finished his story._

_"Who can now tell me the purposes of a Herald?" He asked, as he did every year._

_"They dispense the Queen's justice!" Natalia threw out._

_Teren smiled. "Well then, if Heralds dispense the Queen's justice, what are judges and magistrates for?" He asked._

_Natalia didn't know the answer, but __Loreli__ had an explanation. "Sir, Heralds ride circuit… if the people only got to settle their grievances with each other once or twice a year… problems could come up, so there are judges and magistrates stationed in the towns to take care of everyday problems."_

_"But then why do Heralds need to ride circuit at all?" Teren played Devil's Advocate._

_Draco knew the answer to this one. "Sir, judges and magistrates are people, too… they can become biased in certain cases. Heralds come in, and have clear perspectives. Also, in smaller towns, everyone knows everyone else, and everyone knows someone's reputation… the judge may make his decisions based partially on someone's reputation, even if that reputation is undeserved. Heralds have no foreknowledge of the participants, and so can give better judgment."_

_Teren laughed. "Very good, Draco. Well put! Can anyone else think of something else Heralds do?"_

_Connor raised his hand. "Heralds serve as special messengers for the Crown, sir. Our Companions are much faster than horses, and can travel longer, faster. If a message needs to be carried in a time of war, Heralds are the ones that do it."_

_"Very true, Connor. Is there anything else you can think of?"_

_Aleto__ raised her hand. "Sir… we also support the Monarchs."_

_"Please explain, __Aleto__." Teren smiled, and she knew she had gotten the answer he was looking for._

_"Sir, every monarch needs someone or a group of people to support them and hold them accountable. Like the Monarch's Own supports the Monarch, so do we. We let them know that no matter what, the Heralds will remain loyal. It helps them be better rulers… more secure during their reign."_

_"Exactly. Now, there is one more thing Heralds can be called on to do for our Monarch. We live for them, we judge for them, we can even kill for them…_

_"…and we can die for them." Teren paused to let the information sink in._

_Draco looked around the room at the faces of his peers. They __all appeared determined._

_"Do not worry about that for now, but always be aware of what may occur._

_"You are our future, so live, and live well." Teren paused, and everyone could tell he was thinking of another Trainee that should have been in the class with them… Harry._

_The bell signaling classes' end rang, and Teren dismissed them._

_Draco's year-mates went to their rooms for a free period, but Draco had chores today… he had to hurry to the cafeteria if he wanted to grab some food before his work began!_

o0O0o

That was another unusual thing about this place… chores! Never before had Draco been required to do chores… having been born into luxury, servants had always been there for Draco… but now that they weren't… it felt liberating. He was responsible for everything he did… the responsibility was heady for one who had never had such previous commitment.

Teren taught History like it still applied to life today… and Draco loved it.

He glanced at the time-candle by his bed, and hurriedly put away his notes. Natalia, Aleto, Connor, and Loreli were going to come with him today to visit Ginny, and he had promised to meet them in the Common Room connecting the boys' and girls' dorms five minutes ago!

He ran out of his bedroom to meet them, hoping that today Ginny might react to them.

Author's Note: The tune is that of "Hoist the Colors"


	8. Author's Note and Preview

**THE NEW VERSION IS UP!! IT'S CALLED "I ONCE WAS LOST" AND IS THE RE-WRITE OF NO LONGER ALONE!!**

Now, I know Author's Notes aren't permitted, so this is attached to a very small preview of the new version.

**THIS IS NOT A NEW CHAPTER!! THIS IS A NOTICE THAT THIS STORY IS BEING RE-WORKED IN A MAJOR FASHION!!**

So, as promised, here is what I have of the new prologue. This is very rough and will likely be changed at some point.

o0O0o

"It's been a long time since I looked on this sight." The dark-haired man said to his companions as he looked on a magnificent castle surrounded by an ominous forest through sparkling green eyes.

"I know what you mean. There were times I was sure that we would never survive to make it back here, but here we are." The blond man to his left commented, surveying the sight.

"I always had faith that you would return to this place, even in the darkest times." The tall, black-haired man placed a hand on the first speaker's shoulder. "I knew you would never let us down, no matter what it took." The three men exchanged small smiles with their three female counterparts. It had been a difficult journey, but they were finally home.

The man who had spoken first turned to the women at his right. "Well, my dear. We are home." She smiled and took his arm. "Yes. Finally." She sighed, and added, "Are we going to stand here all day looking at it, or are we going to go down? After all, Hogwarts is waiting for us."

The small troupe of travelers chuckled at her impatience, and the six of them turned away from the ridge overlooking Hogwarts castle toward a number of gleaming white horses and two small pack-horses. One man- the leader of their group- hesitated as he turned away. The woman at his side caught his arm and held him back as the rest walked forward.

"Are you sure you're ready for this, dearheart?" She asked.

"No, I'm not sure at all. We didn't leave under the best of circumstances, if you'll recall." He answered. "But I do believe that this is something I have to do." His green eyes sparkled with determination. As he strode away from her, his back straightened and his shoulders lifted. After so long away, Harry Potter was finally returning to Hogwarts.

o0O0o

So there it is. I will leave the first version up for now, but it will be re-worked into an almost-entirely-different story. I don't know how long it will be until I'll start uploading the new version, but don't hold your breath for too long...


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